![Generally speaking, if you have sex less than once a month, you are in a sexless marriage. Generally speaking, if you have sex less than once a month, you are in a sexless marriage.](https://images.news18.com/ibnlive/uploads/2021/07/1627283897_news18_logo-1200x800.jpg?impolicy=website&width=510&height=383)
Generally speaking, if you have sex less than once a month, you are in a sexless marriage.
A sexless marriage can be lonely, frustrating, and depressing. But don't lose hope. There are ways to overcome and rekindle lost intimacy
Sex permeates our pop culture, but conversations about it are still associated with stigma and shame in Indian homes. As a result, most individuals dealing with sexual health issues or trying to find information about sex often rely on unverified online sources or follow unscientific advice from friends. To address widespread misinformation about sex, News18.com is publishing a weekly sex column titled 'Let's Talk Sex'. With this column, we hope to start a conversation about sex and address sexual health issues with scientific insight and nuance.
In this article, I'll share five practical tips to help you survive and thrive when the spark of desire dwindles.
You thought those burning days of passion would never end. But somewhere along the line the bedroom got cold. Maybe you still love each other deeply, but that sexual spark has disappeared. Or maybe the anger has built up over the years and left you feeling distant and disconnected. Whatever the case, living in a sexless marriage can be lonely, frustrating, and depressing. But don't lose hope. There are ways to overcome and rekindle lost intimacy.
What are the conditions for a sexless marriage?
Generally speaking, if you have sex less than once a month, you are in a sexless marriage. Definitions vary, but most experts consider 10 or less per year to qualify. This can be difficult for many couples because sex is an important part of intimacy and bonding.
common causes
Here are some common reasons why couples end up in sexless marriages:
- Stress and Fatigue: Between work, kids, health issues, and other life stresses, sex can fall to the bottom of your priority list. It's important to take time to connect and unwind.
- Relationship Issues: Lack of emotional intimacy, unresolved anger or resentment, lack of attraction, etc. Addressing communication and relationship obstacles is important.
- Low libido: Hormonal changes, medications, medical conditions, and aging can all contribute to a decrease in sex drive in one or both partners. Talking to your doctor can help determine if you have a medical problem that is affecting your sex drive.
- Lack of intimacy: Without regular emotional and physical intimacy, sexual desire may begin to wane. Make spending quality time together a priority and include regular affectionate touch, such as kissing, hugging, and cuddling.
The emotional impact of a sexless marriage on both partners
A sexless marriage can be an emotionally painful experience for both partners. For partners with low libido, the pressure to be intimate when they're not in the mood can lead to feelings of guilt, anxiety, and anger. Feeling unwanted by your partner may damage your self-esteem over time.
For partners with high libido, constant rejection and unmet needs often result in feelings of frustration, hurt, and anger. You may feel unattractive or unloved even when you rationally know otherwise. Over time, resentment can build as physical intimacy becomes a source of conflict rather than connection.
Lack of sex also deprives couples of oxytocin, the “love hormone” released during orgasm that enhances intimacy and bonding. Without this, partners may begin to feel more like roommates than lovers, and the emotional distance between them grows.
Tips for Rekindling Intimacy in Your Relationship
The good news is that there are many steps you can take to increase intimacy and rekindle a sexless marriage. Open communication, relationship counseling, medical intervention, and making sex a priority again can all help improve the situation.
- Talk openly about your needs. The first step is to start having honest conversations with your partner about what you both want from your sex life and relationship. Be open-minded about your desires, fantasies, and what you feel you're missing. Compromise and find common ground. Make intimacy a priority again.
- Flirt like never before: Do you remember when you first started dating? There was excitement, playfulness, and seduction. Start being flirty with your partner again. Compliment, touch gently, make eye contact, and smile. Flirting releases feel-good hormones that increase attraction and desire.
- Try something new together: Routine life can make the bedroom boring. Try new activities together, such as dancing, rock climbing, or cooking. New experiences release dopamine in the brain, activating the reward center. This will naturally increase your libido and rekindle passion. You can also try role-playing or new sex positions to increase intimacy.
- Make time for intimacy: Don't let life get in the way of your sex life. Make time and space for intimacy a priority. Have a date night, light candles, and massage each other with scented oil. Rediscover intimacy through sensual touch and connection. Turn off the technology and be fully present with each other.
- Get advice if you need it: If you have truly lost relationships and intimacy, consider relationship counseling or sex therapy. A counselor can help you identify problems, provide coping strategies, and find a path to rekindling emotional and physical intimacy. They may also suggest exercises that improve communication, touch and playfulness. Professional guidance at work can help restore intimacy.
Rekindling intimacy and connection may take time and effort, but by being open, exploring together, and making it a priority, you can find your way back to a satisfying sex life and relationship. With patience and persistence, you can survive even a cold bedroom.
Here are five practical ways to deal with loss of passion in your marriage. A sexless relationship can feel lonely and discouraging, but remember that you still have a partner by your side. Focus on rebuilding intimacy through honest communication, sharing new experiences, and fulfillment outside of the bedroom. If your requirements are still not met, seek professional help to find the root cause of the problem. Your intimate relationship may ebb and flow over the years, but your love and commitment may remain steadfast. With a little understanding, effort, and creativity, you can turn things around and rediscover the passion you once shared.