Dear We are Teachers,
I've taught AP Lit for 12 years, and I'm no stranger to the geriatrics that come with this time of year. But I don't think I've seen it this year. Most of my students have gone on to college and committed to the school of their choice, but right now about 35% of my classes are failing. I know they need a wake-up call, but “you won’t graduate” doesn’t seem to work. what's the matter? How can I help them?
—Running on empty
Dear ROE,
Since I've never taught seniors before, I'll defer to Big Kid expert Meghan Mathis. Here's what she said:
“It’s too severe. Having taught upper-grade English for almost 10 years, I know how much effort you already put into helping your students get through the graduation stage. And it's really frustrating when they don't seem to be doing anything to get to the graduation stage.
“Let’s start by meeting one-on-one. Show them your grades and ask them point blank what their plan is if they fail the class. Because their current choices are leading them. Now is the time to be blunt. 'If I don't fix this quickly, how are I going to explain to my family that I can't get my diploma in class because I have to attend summer school to earn credits I can't earn? ?' Don't leave that hem lying around. Ask your family to imagine telling you that they failed.
“If things don't change, figure out where they're headed and then make a plan for how the two of you can get your diplomas together. Yes, they are seniors. Yes, some of them might technically be 18 years old. But in reality, many of them still feel like children who need our help. Have a clear, actionable plan in mind for how they can complete the assignments they need to do or the tasks they need to complete to pass the class. Make sure they are broken down into small, manageable chunks and that you have frequent check-ins between this meeting and the last day you can turn in the assignment.
“Is this a lot? totally. Should I be held responsible for this? Absolutely not. However, if your goal is to help these students earn a diploma, you will need to provide a lot of support to get them there. Close the meeting by letting them know how committed you are to seeing them graduate and how possible it is if they follow the plan you both agreed upon. Please tell us one specific task you need to accomplish and a firm deadline for when you would like to see it accomplished.
“And what if they don’t submit it? This is a good time to schedule meetings with students, parents/guardians, school counselors, and principals. Get a plan so you can see everything you've tried so far and decide as a team what your next steps should be. Good luck!”
(Isn’t Meghan amazing?)
One thing I would like to add is to let the principal know that 35% of AP Lit classes are non-passable courses and invite him/her to come personally to encourage the class. Maybe you'll hear the same thing from someone else. ~ no You'll wake up when you hand over your diploma in a few weeks.
Dear We are Teachers,
Okay, I don't know if it's just the middle school where I work, but the screaming has become unbearable. Children are letting out bloodcurdling screams in classrooms, hallways, and at lunchtime. It's funny, it's surprising, it's not an exaggerated response to something disgusting. They're obviously doing it to catch teachers off guard and see who can get away with it. And so far they are just getting over it. Because the principal thinks this is just regular May rowdy behavior. Can teachers do anything about this?
—I scream even when I don't have to.
Dear ISFNS,
You have two options: attack and defense. You can play only defense, only offense, or both. (Is this true for all sports? I don’t know. I should stop making analogies about sports.)
defense: Buy loop earplugs. If any student breaks the rules, call home.
violation: Tell your principal that you have received many complaints from students about how annoying and hurtful to their ears is the screaming in the hallways. Ask if it's okay to practice email etiquette/advocacy and write to them about the problem. I hope the principal can see the writing on the wall. Annoying kids = Annoying parents.
If the principal says, “No, we’re going to end this now,” that’s fine.
The principal said, “That’s a really good idea!” This time of year, I want to reply to hundreds of emails!”, do it! And encourage your students to write a similar email to their parents, too!
I keep coming back to this thought. That said, it's sad that parents can get things done at school much faster than teachers. But for now, it's the truth anyway. So we have to… defend…? Uh, I don't know, right?!
Dear We are Teachers,
I am finishing my first year teaching fifth grade. The biggest piece of feedback I received from administrators this year was to not take student rudeness and defiance personally. I know he's right (and he gave me this feedback in the nicest way possible). But I don't know how to “improve” this. Are there any specific strategies or techniques you recommend for classifying your child's behavior and separating it from human emotions?
—Human (Shocking, I know)
Dear Ah,
Without a doubt, the most helpful thing I learned before teaching middle school was the anatomy of children's brains. I can't tell you how many times I've thought of their shrunken, underdeveloped frontal lobes. To illustrate my point:
Does your pencil sharpener leave a pile of pencil shavings right next to the trash can instead of inside it? Underdeveloped frontal lobe.
Did you find “I EAT SH*T TACOS” scrawled on your desk? Underdeveloped frontal lobe.
Stepping on a strategically twisted ketchup packet and getting ketchup all over my White Air Force? Underdeveloped frontal lobe.
But seriously, it has helped me a lot to know that even when my students make reactionary or bad choices, they do so too. Biologically, we can't do better. This does not mean that they are off the hook or that I dismiss their poor choices. It just meant I could deal with them without thinking that their behavior reflected me or my teachings.
Here's some other advice: I'll link to where I found it so you can read more!
“I learned about behavior, trauma, and relationships. And it gives me an opportunity to explore my own trauma history and build coping skills. For example, I help my children in a variety of ways, including using a calm voice and body, consistent and clear communication, taking responsibility for my own actions and mistakes, and consistently giving gentle warnings before broaching topics that require greater mental effort. Focus on safety. And emotional uplift, take a breath and be a receptive and unwavering rock when they are triggered. When we notice a particularly difficult behavior, we remember that children do well when they are good inside and can do it. “If things don’t work out, I remind myself that I’m having a hard time.” —AW Facebook HELPLINE Group
“Two words: reasonable separation. You need to get out of your emotional brain and focus on your thinking brain. Reasonable detachment is the ability to remain professional by remaining calm and in control even in moments of crisis. “It means I don’t take it personally even if there are comments that push my buttons.” —Principals know how to keep their cool during tense conversations. Here's how they do it:
“The best thing about teaching is that we are all human. The worst thing about teaching is that we are all human. School has too much baggage. There isn't enough time in the world to figure out why kids say or do what they do. So, without personalizing it, take a step back and deal with what's going on. Next time you run out of patience, ask yourself: What does this student need now?” —Our article 11 Big Classroom Management Mistakes (and How to Fix them)
Lastly, if all else fails, imagine that they are babies. Or a dog. Or some other creature that never twists a ketchup packet with the intention of exploding at you.
Do you have any questions? Please email askweareteachers@weareteachers.com.
Dear We are Teachers,
I finally decided to leave a school with a toxic principal. I am applying to a new school in a new area. I'm curious about what to write in the 'Reason for Leaving' section of the application form. I am thinking, ‘I am looking for leadership that reflects my educational philosophy’ or ‘I need to improve my work culture.’ Which one would you recommend?
—Peace!