Three common feedback problems
Perhaps there are few people in the world who are more engaged and more frequently involved in giving and receiving feedback than executive coaches. As a coach for over 20 years, I can't tell you how many times I've prepared, delivered, and supported clients to receive peer feedback. You can easily exceed 2,000 times.
So when Coaching.com asked me last week to lead a group coaching conversation about giving and receiving feedback for the largest coaching session ever (1,000 coachees and 100 coaches), it was an easy yes. Even though I had a lot of experience giving and receiving feedback, I didn’t want to settle for just my own perspective. So, I posted on LinkedIn to get feedback and ideas from fellow coaches about three common feedback issues I covered in a Coaching.com session I led.
- What is the most effective way to deliver actionable and potentially transformative feedback?
- What mindset and approach are important to make the most of the feedback you receive?
- How can you help create a culture of regular feedback that is a welcomed part of your coaching approach instead of a dreaded annual event?
As expected, I got some great ideas from my colleagues (thanks to Mary Jo Hazard, Mark House, Scott Montgomery, Susan Britton, Darcie Slanker Milano, HsuanHua Chang, and Jonathan King). Because we only had one hour with the group during the session, we had more to talk about and share than we had time for. But here's all my coaching advice on how to give and receive feedback.
Delivering Effective Feedback: The Art of Bringing Change
- First, recognize that positive reinforcing feedback can be just as valuable or more valuable than constructive feedback. As Ken Blanchard says, don't overlook opportunities to: “Catch them doing the right thing.” And it must be connected to the concrete, tangible impact that what you are doing is having on creating positive outcomes.
- Take advantage of it Simplicity in maintaining, starting and stopping skeleton. This will help you stay focused on delivering feedback on the behavior and its impact rather than on the person.
- focus on situation in hand, action (positive or negative), effect Such actions serve both the goals of the organization and the goals of the person you are coaching.
- Keep it in a timely manner and keep it private.. Deliver feedback while data points are still fresh and memorable. To create a psychologically safe environment, give feedback one-on-one and privately. The exception to this rule is when you feel you have positive feedback to deliver and an awareness and learning opportunity to get it in front of your team. Nonetheless, be careful not to make recipients uncomfortable or put them above the rest of the group.
- Maintain conversation and observation.. Giving and receiving feedback is a normal part of doing business together. It should not be a sporadic or traumatic event. Talking about and observing the behavior and its impact may be helpful.
- Observe and circle again later. Reinforce feedback messages in real time with real-world examples. Feedback becomes exponentially more effective when you pull the thread to its end by finding and acting on opportunities to highlight positive behavior change and its impact. This is the ideal situation. Of course, there may be times when continued observation points to new opportunities for progress.
Get feedback: mindsets and approaches that make a difference
- Do you know or don't you know? This is a question we often ask our clients when relaying feedback to colleagues, especially when it's difficult to hear. Most successful managers want to know this information because it is what they need to improve their situation. Inherent in that question is a sense that the person receiving the feedback has the power to act to improve the situation and achieve the goal.
- Ask for examples to illustrate your point. When receiving feedback, especially if it starts with something a bit vague and general (e.g., “You need to be more strategic”), it can be helpful to ask for real-life examples of what works and what doesn’t work when it comes to feedback. . The feedback you are receiving. The goal is to get enough data points to do pattern analysis on what to keep, start, and stop.
- Ask for action step ideas. If you get feedback that you're making an effort, talk to five or six colleagues who can regularly observe how you're showing up. Describe what you are currently working on and why, and ask anyone working on what you are currently working on for some of their best ideas for steps in the work that could be improved. Maintain a master list of action steps suggested by your colleagues.
- Start with these action steps: It's relatively easy to do and is likely to make a difference.. Pick a few steps from the list that meet that description and let a small group of your colleagues know that's what you're starting with. For example, if you've received feedback that you could be a better listener, someone might have suggested action steps for you, such as “Ask other people what they think before giving yours.”
- Recruiting responsible partners. Once you've chosen which action steps to begin, recruit key colleagues to serve as accountability partners. For example, in the first example you just cited of asking for someone else's opinion, you could ask your colleague to watch you do that in a meeting and remind you to approach it again if you forget. Not only will it help you change your behavior; It will help them change their perception of your behavior.
- Perceptual change almost always lags behind behavioral change. This is why an accountability partner approach to feedback is so effective and important. When you exhibit counterproductive behavior over time, people develop stories about you and that behavior. With focus and follow-up, you can legally change that behavior relatively quickly, but if you don't engage people about how your behavior impacts them, you're likely to remain in their long-term narrative about you. Accelerating change in perception through active engagement transforms the entire workforce system for the better and for the benefit of all.
Building a Feedback Culture: More Than Just an Annual Review
Ideally, giving and receiving feedback should be a regular and welcomed aspect of how your organization does business. A feedback culture fosters the growth mindset that organizations need to compete in a rapidly changing world.
How do you build this culture in your organization? For leaders at all levels, from the front lines to the C-suite, the answer is simple. Be a role model. Find feedback on what to keep, start, and stop to help your team succeed. Be transparent about what you learn from feedback. Engage your colleagues to further leverage your strengths and take advantage of opportunities.
What's next and what's next?
Which of the ideas that my fellow coaches and I have shared here are you willing to pick up and implement? What else have you learned about giving and receiving feedback that you should add to what we've shared? Send me a message or leave a comment on LinkedIn.
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